Here I return triumphant
Well pop pickers, time for another bag of utter cuntshite to foul up the scripwriting blogosphere.
Where do I sit within this fast-becoming over populated world?
Fairly and squarely in the 'unproduced' section I am afraid. One of the millions as opposed to the twenty.
And loving every minute of it.
I dunno what it is about the Spring/Summer interface paradigm, but it was at about this time last year that I got my first proper-ish break. Being commissioned to re-write a horror film. It didn't get made, but it got me into the Writers Guild, got me a little bit of moolah and immediately elevated me to second-dan scum.
And now this year ... things are beginning to kick off a little bit too.
Firstly and foremostly, I have to finish three scripts by the middle of June for college and shit. Not going to happen at all. But I am doing my best dammit. I will be brave, and in about two months I will have two kick-ass feature length scripts to hawk around.
I also decided to make a film. Obviously I am not busy enough. I need to be doing more, when not holding down the full time job (at which I still rock), keeping a very lucky lady on her toes and being the lynchpin of at least twelve different social circles.
So the current plan is ... write a script in July/August. Get it developed and finished by Christmas. Do some technical training shit, get a small team of people together. Shoot a feature on DV in March/April next year. Edit in May/June. Get a rough cut together and use that to raise some funds for proper post-production and marketing.
Shoot the film for a couple of grand. Maybe 10-20 for the rest of the stuff.
Honestly, it's easy.
As the old say goes: if you want something doing, ask a busy man. I think.
So ... as soon as I bought the Guide to Keeping Guerillas or whatever it's called, I got a call from my very good friend the Famous Director. I sent him String a couple of weeks ago - a 30-page treatment, the product of months of sweat, pain and darts thrown at the Yorkshire Menk's head.
He called me a week later - last Thursday. I couldn't take the call as I was eating onion rings and watching the cricket. But I called him back. He has read the treatment twice. He loved it. He said 'can I take it to Cannes?' I said you can take it to Fine Fare for all I care bitch!
So it's going to Cannes. He gave me some notes. On Friday he called me again and said 'how soon can you make those changes?' I said a couple of days. He said 'get it to me by Saturday and I can get it into the hands of ***** *****. That is not a real name, but it covers up the name of an ex-Hollywood A-lister. The sort of bloke who can still open a film, even though he is not as big as he was in the 1990s. And a man who could probably play the main role.
Excited? I am trying not to be.
Oh yer - and I am having meetings with another prodco ... something to do with writing some pitches for them to take to funding companies I think.
So get down on your knees bitches, and suck from the hosepipe of the SCRIPT DADDY.
Where do I sit within this fast-becoming over populated world?
Fairly and squarely in the 'unproduced' section I am afraid. One of the millions as opposed to the twenty.
And loving every minute of it.
I dunno what it is about the Spring/Summer interface paradigm, but it was at about this time last year that I got my first proper-ish break. Being commissioned to re-write a horror film. It didn't get made, but it got me into the Writers Guild, got me a little bit of moolah and immediately elevated me to second-dan scum.
And now this year ... things are beginning to kick off a little bit too.
Firstly and foremostly, I have to finish three scripts by the middle of June for college and shit. Not going to happen at all. But I am doing my best dammit. I will be brave, and in about two months I will have two kick-ass feature length scripts to hawk around.
I also decided to make a film. Obviously I am not busy enough. I need to be doing more, when not holding down the full time job (at which I still rock), keeping a very lucky lady on her toes and being the lynchpin of at least twelve different social circles.
So the current plan is ... write a script in July/August. Get it developed and finished by Christmas. Do some technical training shit, get a small team of people together. Shoot a feature on DV in March/April next year. Edit in May/June. Get a rough cut together and use that to raise some funds for proper post-production and marketing.
Shoot the film for a couple of grand. Maybe 10-20 for the rest of the stuff.
Honestly, it's easy.
As the old say goes: if you want something doing, ask a busy man. I think.
So ... as soon as I bought the Guide to Keeping Guerillas or whatever it's called, I got a call from my very good friend the Famous Director. I sent him String a couple of weeks ago - a 30-page treatment, the product of months of sweat, pain and darts thrown at the Yorkshire Menk's head.
He called me a week later - last Thursday. I couldn't take the call as I was eating onion rings and watching the cricket. But I called him back. He has read the treatment twice. He loved it. He said 'can I take it to Cannes?' I said you can take it to Fine Fare for all I care bitch!
So it's going to Cannes. He gave me some notes. On Friday he called me again and said 'how soon can you make those changes?' I said a couple of days. He said 'get it to me by Saturday and I can get it into the hands of ***** *****. That is not a real name, but it covers up the name of an ex-Hollywood A-lister. The sort of bloke who can still open a film, even though he is not as big as he was in the 1990s. And a man who could probably play the main role.
Excited? I am trying not to be.
Oh yer - and I am having meetings with another prodco ... something to do with writing some pitches for them to take to funding companies I think.
So get down on your knees bitches, and suck from the hosepipe of the SCRIPT DADDY.
